Day 24

Finally finished the analysis for the FGDs! I am quite happy that it is more or less done - now all that is left is to put in the quotes, which will take some restructuring of the report itself (to ensure that the quotes flow and do not "stick out" of the report). I have started worrying about the literature review however because I essentially stopped reading and reviewing articles when I started working on the transcripts and analysis for the FGDs, which is not good as it means I have quite a bit to catch up on. I need to ensure that I finish sorting out the analysis soon so that I can begin sourcing for more articles again, particularly as I know how difficult it is to find articles related to the elderly and counselling.

The network today was very interesting, and I was fortunate enough to be able to listen to all the different speakers share. Hearing about the differnet types of dementia and how the disease affects different parts of the brain was very interesting! It explained how some symptoms turn up in some patients with dementia but not in others, and why some are seen as being "more manageable" than other elderly with dementia. It had not occurred to me that dementia would affect more than one part of the brain as it has so many different symptoms, and how by affecting specific parts of the brain more so than other areas that it would mean that specific symptoms would develop more acutely than other symptoms.

It was also interesting to see them using the A-B-C framework to do with dementia, as it reminded me of CBT, although in a different context. It reminded me that sometimes theories are not merely useful for the specific things they hope to explain, but that we can borrow their frameworks and ways of looking at things and adapt them to new contexts. It was quite enlightening to look at the "antecedents" to problem behaviour not just being the dieasease that affects it, but the environment as well (like if they dont like the activity and are bored they woule act out more than if they were occupied). The way we ourselves act and react towards them can have a huge impat on their behaviour as well, and can actually result in the very consequences we were hoping to avoid initially.

Dementia has always scared me, both in terms of what if my parents get it (as I do not know how I would cope being a caregiver, given mine and my brother's potential working hours, reluctance to get a maid, and potentially not being able to cope with work and care), and also in terms of what if I get it. I do not like the thought of not being able to control my mind; losing control of the body is very scary as well, but at least you can help to strengthen it, prevent itm and it is relatively simpler to treat the body. Losing control of the mind is something I fell i would have less control over somehow - in addition to the fact that the mind controls the body and so many other things (so in all likelihood if the mind goes, the body will too - but not necessarily vice versa). Without the body, you can still think, talk, interact with people. However, if you lose the mind, you cannot do so much, and cannot think straight. This is when it would be easy to become a burden to others, as when you cannot think for yourself, others have to constantly think for you. This is something I would not want for myself, as losing your ability to think is almost akin to losing who you are as a person in fact.

Watching the elderly perform also reminded me of the time I helped to conduct a practise research at SAGE toa payoh last year, where we worked with the elderly for 12 weeks to put up a miniature performance. It was a little like reminiscence work in the sense that we tapped on their memories about the past and and asked them toe reflect regularly. So for me, to be able to see the final product of a programme that was run for a much longer period was intersting. I must say that the actors were very good, and the play was relevant in terms of the issues it raised - they were easy to identify with and would be good for an audience of all ages.

This makes me begin to wonder if it would be possible to do something similar with movement. I can see why eldelry would hesitate when it comes to movement because it is something that can easily highlight their frailty, and possibly show up their inability to do certain things (due to wear and tear with age). But given how the elderly are so active in the community clubs in activities like chinese dance and ballroom dance, I am sure that there is a away to do movement expression with the elderly as well! This is something for me to think about, particularly given my interest and intention to go into dance, and what with the aging population in Singapore, this could be a new need (either a service gap or a market opportunity) for me to look into.